It's been a year since I quit to write full time.
And it feels very different from what I always imagined it would be like.
Three months.
According to psychologists and the first mentor I ever had in the workforce, it can take at least three to six months to adjust to changes in life. From the small ones (like getting a new car) to the big ones (like going back to school after 13 years), time is a necessary component in a solid adjustment strategy.
So here’s the thing. It’s been exactly one year since I left corporate, and I just haven’t been adjusting. I know this, my friends know this, and my husband definitely knows it.
My ADHD brain cannot survive this lack of structure.
So I spent a lot of time soul-searching since my corporate career ended, and here are some of my observations:
I don’t need to leave a “day job”. I just needed to leave an “executive day job for a corporation.”
Writing as a “day job” becomes too much like an “executive day job for a corporation” so I need to look at it as an outlet if I’m going to continue to be productive. I just need more time to focus on said outlet than I had before.
I’ve spent a decade trying to make sense of my love for Popular Romance and Diversity Equity and Inclusion praxis. As if those two things are completely separate. Maybe my new “day job” needs to be developing a job that works for me and conjoins the two?
My “day job” cannot interfere with the writing career that I’ve established for myself thus far, because I have hustled two damn hard to go backwards. Instead, it needs to continue to further my writing career without making “writing” my day job. Which goes back to point 2.
Boundaries. I need to continue to work on developing boundaries because YOLO and FOMO are actually horrible concepts for mental health.
After exploring all the opportunities that I have been privileged to have, I’ve decided that academia has been the one safe space I’ve thrived. So I have secured a fully funded position at a University where I can teach, take classes and in a few years write a dissertation that will hopefully unite both DEI and Popular Romance studies.
Will I finish? Who knows? So many students drop out of programs like this. I mean, I don’t need it. I have a law degree, and two master’s degrees. I had a career already.
And I’m still trying to have a family which will require time in the future.
But does it make me happy? Does it help focus my writing so I can actually do what I’m currently doing but BETTER? Do I feel less stressed than I ever have before? Will this new career path produce more writing that I will be so proud to share with all of you?
Absofreakinglutely.
Have I been committing to a balanced lifestyle?
Well, sort of.
Because this week is HELL WEEK, balance has sort of gone out the window.
Hell Week is the week before a book deadline. It’s the time when I have to somehow make my 150 pages of garbage into 300 pages of readable-garbage for my editor. I am playing all sorts of equations out in my head where I have to figure the number of words I need to write a day in order to submit by midnight on day seven.
And because I’m back in school, I have so much inspiration and so many ideas on Veera and Deepak’s story, the third book in my Shakespeare inspired romance series.
See, Veer and Deepak are the last of the lot. They are the single friends in the sea of married friends. Their love story has to be one for the books! So Hell Week is going to be about digging deep in all of that emotional turmoil I experienced in my twenties and writing something from the heart.
But I’m feeling so freaking centered and happy when I do it.
This newsletter is a bit all over the place, but I just want to drive home the one point that is the most important for me to share.
Sometimes the dreams we envision for ourselves (like writing full time) aren’t all they are made out to be. I’m so blessed and lucky enough to realize it so early after I left my corporate job.
I’m not saying that I never want to write full time again, but maybe just not right now.
So on the one year anniversary of my last day in a corporate job position, I’m going to celebrate the fact that I have options to pursue what make me happy. Nothing more and nothing less. Because that alone is still such an incredible privilege to have.
And until next newsletter, just know that academia and writing suit me perfectly. I don’t need 3 months to tell you that I’ve adjusted, because this feels exactly right.
Now back to Deepak and Veera shenanigans.
Thanks for reading, besties!
If you want some more introspection, THE KARMA MAP is on sale on Kindle, and check out the #23for23 hashtag on socials to see all the incredible book recommendations!
See you in the next newsletter.
XoXo, Nisha
I love this! Love a woman brave enough to walk away from something, then change her mind and modify and edit and find what works for her through trial and error. I am also golden retriever levels of excited for Veera and Deepak!!